For quite a while now, I've been the person plenty of people come to whether it be in need of a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, or what have you. For that same amount of time, I've listened, given advice, thought endlessly on other people's lives, and generally neglected the one person in all of this that really matters: myself. I've gone around strutting about and yelling that I know myself very well and that I'm here if anyone needs me. The thing that hits me now in the wee hours of the morning, is that I don't know who I am at all, and that my shoulder is completely saturated with tears as well as my ear being full of many a word.

Why do I continue to neglect myself in preference of being the proverbial kind ear and word? Why must I interject myself into people's lives whenever they seem to have a dilemma, or, even worse, when they don't have a dilemma? Am I so reliant on other people's problems that I feel I need to hear about other people's misery so I can be happy?

The one question that keeps coming up is "Why do I do it?" I can't answer this honestly in any way because I don't have a true answer for it. Does this mean that I should just stop being the kind shoulder and the listening ear? Or does this mean that I need to keep on what I'm doing for the slight benefit of others with the sacrifice of my finding out who I really am?

it's 2006 and it's here to stay...for a year. i have, once again, resolved to lose weight and get healthier. wow, so original. i feel good about it and i might actually work towards getting it.

i go back to school on the seventeenth and i actually can't wait for it. for one, auditions for The Taming of the Shrew are the week i come back and there isn't another Shakespeare play that i'd love to do more. it's so funny and energetic that it stole my heart the first time i saw it. and, now that i'm not working wednesdays, i can actually audition for this one! go team David.

i played basketball yesterday for the first time in, like, 2 years. i'm sore, but i had fun. i also lost to a couple of Mexicans with a friend in basketball, but i'm not worried about it cuz these guys were pretty good. the only bad thing about it is i woke up my knee injury from Oklahoma! so work was not fun last night whenever i had to get up from my chair. it sucked, but i'll get over it.

that's probably the last entry i'll do for at least a month so savor this while it lasts.

"THE WONDER CLASS" this is the phrase i coined for the class of 2006 at LHS. what do they do with that phrase? they put it in their senior ad in the musical program...WITHOUT ACKNOWLEDGING ME AS THE CREATOR!!! who the hell do these kids think they are?! i swear, if i weren't friends with them all, i would be mad with them. but, alas, they are great kids, and it's good to know they listened to something i said.

there i'm done now.

DAMN, DAMN, FUCK, DAMN!!! That God Damned pedofile Michael Jackson was found INNOCENT ON ALL CHARGES!!! u have to be fucking kidding me! all the evidence in the world points to the fact that he's a pedofile and he's found NOT GUILTY?! THAT'S BULLSHIT!!! the jury shouldn't even be considered a good jury, all of them had ties to Wacko Jacko somehow and no one complained about it?! this is the worst possible thing to happen since they found him innocent the last time. people need to get it through their thick skulls that this guy will not stop molesting little boys until he's put in jail and freaking prisoners with his removeable nose.

DAMN IT!!!